A Wild (and Eye-Opening) Analysis
Ever wondered who would win in a bizarre battle between one silverback gorilla and 100 optometrists? While it’s a completely hypothetical—and wildly unrealistic—matchup, it’s also a fun way to explore just how powerful gorillas are… and how strategic optometrists could be under pressure. At Optical Illusions: An Optometric Practice, we usually focus on vision correction, glasses, and eye health in San Jose, San Mateo, San Ramon, and Juneau. But today? We’re diving into a wild “what-if” scenario you’ll never forget.
Meet the Silverback Gorilla
A silverback gorilla is no ordinary opponent. This mountain of muscle is:
- Weighing in at 400+ pounds
- 4–9x stronger than an average man
- Able to lift nearly 1,800 pounds
- Equipped with a bite force of 1,300 PSI
- Running up to 20 mph
Gorillas are built for brute force and intimidation. They have thick skin, powerful limbs, and an aggressive nature when threatened. A single blow could knock an untrained human unconscious—or worse.
Enter the 100 Optometrists
So, what happens when you pit this powerful primate against 100 trained optometrists?
Let’s be clear: Optometrists are experts in diagnosing and treating eye diseases—not hand-to-hand combat. But they do bring some unique advantages to the table:
- Extensive knowledge of human anatomy
- Precision, patience, and attention to detail
- Problem-solving under pressure
- Decent coordination (from years of steady-handed exams)
Still, we’re not talking about UFC fighters here. We’re talking about doctors who save your sight—not lives in the ring.
The Hypothetical Battle: Gorilla vs. Optometrists
Let’s assume:
- The optometrists are unarmed.
- The battle takes place in a large open field.
- No escape routes. No contact lenses or tonometers as weapons.
Here’s how it might play out:
Round 1: Shock and Awe
The gorilla charges. The first few brave optometrists? Likely downed instantly. The sheer power, speed, and intimidation would cause panic.
Round 2: Strategic Retreat
Optometrists may regroup, form a plan, and start using swarm tactics—rotating attackers in waves to wear the gorilla down. Remember: only about 5–10 could attack at once due to space.
Round 3: Gorilla Fatigue
As strong as a silverback is, it’s not built for long-term endurance. After flooring dozens, it would start to slow. At this point, the optometrists could overpower it through teamwork, coordination, and—ironically—vision.
The Final Verdict: Optometrists Win (Barely)
In the end, 100 optometrists could defeat 1 silverback gorilla, but only through:
- Overwhelming numbers
- Tactical teamwork
- Fatigue-based strategy
However, the victory would come at a steep price—perhaps dozens of bruised and broken glasses… and bones.
Why This Matters (Sort Of)
At Optical Illusions: An Optometric Practice, we may not be training for jungle warfare—but we do fight daily to protect your eye health. Whether it’s battling glaucoma, dry eye, or digital eye strain, our team is always ready.
Our experienced optometrists use state-of-the-art technology to diagnose and treat eye conditions through comprehensive medical eye exams. Don’t wait until symptoms get worse—schedule your eye exam today and take proactive steps towards safeguarding your vision and health. Contact our team to schedule your appointment at 1 of our 4 conveniently located offices in in San Jose, San Mateo, San Ramon, and Juneau
